


Try It Out, And Then You'll See

by AislinCade, Iambic



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Crack, Green Eggs and Ham, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2015-03-26
Packaged: 2018-03-19 19:16:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3621186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AislinCade/pseuds/AislinCade, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iambic/pseuds/Iambic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The progression from antagonistic beginnings to a steamy finish. In verse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Try It Out, And Then You'll See

**Author's Note:**

> With apologies to Dr Seuss.

I am Dorian.

 

_I am Bull._

_The Iron Bull._

 

That Iron Bull

That Iron Bull!

I do not like the Iron Bull.

 

_Did you know you’re beautiful?_

 

I’m well aware, The Iron Bull.

Exactly what are you trying to pull?

 

_I think forbidden gets you hot._

 

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

There’s nothing I want from you, you lout.

I do not trust you, Iron Bull.

What is it you’re trying to pull?

 

_I just think you wanna see_

_What it’s like to be with me._

 

There’s nothing that I want to see,

There’s not a chance that you’d tempt me.

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

There’s nothing I want from you, you lout.

I do not trust you, Iron Bull.

What is it you’re trying to pull?

 

_I’d tear your clothes, if you want me to._

_I’d pin you down, I’d conquer you._

 

Conquer me? You wretched beast.

I would rather that you ceased!

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

There’s nothing I want from you, you lout.

I do not trust you, Iron Bull.

What is it you’re trying to pull?

 

_Worried that I’d kill a Vint?_

_Not unless you’re burning kids._

 

I would not, could not, kill a child

(I do respect that gets you riled.)

 

_You might like me, after all._

_You might find you’re in my thrall._

 

Into a thrall I do not fall

I will not be coerced at all

My clothes are quite expensive, too

You tear them off, I’ll conquer _you_

There’s nothing that I want to see

(Though some would clearly disagree)

If I know what you spoke about

It’s hardly thanks to you, you lout

I cannot read you, Iron Bull

What is it that you’re trying to pull?

 

_Think you’d do it on the ground?_

_Think you’d try it upside-down?_

 

Not on the ground or from a tree

Don’t rip my clothes, you don’t tempt me!

You know they cost a fortune, too

You rip them off, I’ll conquer you

...Though, something that I’d like to see

Could you do what you’re telling me?

I’m unconvinced you’d live it out

You’ve been all talk ‘till now, you lout

I don’t believe you, Iron Bull

I know just what you’re trying to pull.

 

_Hey!_

_In the dark?_

_Here in the dark!_

_Think you’d rather, in the dark?_

 

It makes no difference

in the dark!

 

_Think you'd rather,_

_in the rain?_

 

I’d hardly do it in the rain

Not in the dark! You’re such a pain!

Don’t rip my clothes, you let them be!

You can’t afford them, so you’ll see

Not even were I in your thrall

Would I agree to that at all

I’ve got you figured, Iron Bull,

I know just what you’re trying to pull

  
_But otherwise,_

_You think you would?_

 

I’ve promised nothing,

Understood?

 

_I’d honestly_

_prefer my bed._

 

Your roof leaks!

Do you want me dead?

 

_We could go to yours instead._

 

Use my room, and risk my sheets?

Not with your surely filthy feet

I wouldn’t do it in the rain

Must I go over this again?

You rip my clothes, I’ll burn you down

There’s hardly more lying around

You cannot get me in your thrall

You won’t convince me, not at all

How many times must I repeat

I won’t back down, not in defeat

I have you figured, Iron Bull

I know just what you’re trying to pull

 

I’ve promised nothing,

Understood?

But if I did

You make it good.

 

_You’ve given it some thought, I see_

_I’m told I’m all I’ve claimed to be_

_Try it out, and then you’ll see._

 

Ugh!

If it’ll shut you up,

I will confess, I’ve given up.

There’s no point to denying now

That I’ve considered it. And how.

 

[The morning after] 

 

Hmm,

What they say I see is true

You lived up what you said you’d do

Your roof does leak, but you are warm

I’ll get it fixed. You have been warned.

I won’t agree to in the rain

I think I will come back again

If you can find some cheaper clothes

I’ll let you rip them, I suppose.

 

I wouldn’t say I’m in your thrall

But I _am_  glad I made that call

Three times was good, but I’ll repeat

Today I could not take a seat.

If that was what you meant to pull

Then you’ve succeeded, Iron Bull.

 

I do enjoy it when we fuck

So I suppose that you’re in luck.


End file.
